A Day at the Nude Beach 

Sign at entrance to Gunnison Beach

A Day…well, maybe just a few hours at a Nude Beach
“In 1999, New Jersey passed a law that allows municipalities and counties to prohibit all types of nudism on state or local beaches in their jurisdiction. Gunnison Beach, however, is on land owned and managed by the federal government and therefore is not subject to state or local regulations. As a result, Gunnison became the only legal nude beach in the state. Also, since there is no law against alcohol on federal lands, consumption of alcoholic beverages is permitted. Gunnison is the largest clothing-optional recreation area on the East Coast. The clothing optional beach, which offers dramatic views of Brooklyn and the Verrazano Narrows Bridge, attracts nearly 5,000 naturists per weekend in the summer months. Part of the beach is shared on a seasonal basis with a reserved breeding ground for the endangered piping plover, a native shore bird.” – Holy Grail of information Wikipedia

After almost 50 years of life, I decided to venture down to Sandy Hook, NJ home of Gunnison Beach. A sunny Thursday was the perfect day; no traffic, no stress, no having to leave at 5AM to make sure you get parking, but of course there’s no escaping the one car passing you at 190 blasting Bon Jovi while the smell of Axe lingers long after they fly by. 

So the beach itself. First off, its about a mile walk from parking the car to the actual sand. I assume that’s to keep out the crowd of lazy gawkers or who more accurately would say, “Hey let me go check out some naked people…wait you mean to tell me I have to walk a mile from the parking lot, then a half mile in the sand…forget it, I’ll just stick with my phone.” 

After the cardio workout, I finally did get the beach…and what a beach it is. There’s nakedness everywhere. All shapes and sizes, ages and races, like a naked UN. People playing volleyball naked, swimming naked, BBQing naked and even one guy who seemed like the mayor of the place…coming up to everyone, shaking hands, making small talk. All was good except if you were sitting down as then his crotch was dangerously close to face level.  

The set up of the chair is crucial.  Whenever at the beach, I try and set up away from the whiny kids, loud talkers, people who blast their music, the families of 40 who set up for the summer or generally any one else who I think would cause the time to be miserable; of course inevitably they set up shop next you anyway. At Gunnison, it was a different story. Here all I cared about was not being in direct line of anything that would make me giggle, at a nude beach, almost an impossibility for someone who has the maturity of a 12 year old. It wasn’t easy, but I found a place for my chair.

Making sure I covered the beach chair with a towel, after all, hygiene, I decided to strip down and embrace the saying when in Rome. There I sat, fruit salad in hand, no crude metaphor, it was actual fruit as I’m trying to eat healthier, enjoying the sun. Two hours later, I was done, failing to realize that 30 SPF was not high enough for skin that hasn’t seen the sun, possibly ever. A day and interesting tan line later, it was a great time and most importantly I look forward to the hour when the aloe will finally work.  

#Gunnison #Sandyhook #beach 

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